Moving Is Filled With Goodbyes

Goodbye Takes Many Forms

Moving is a time of saying hello to unknown, future adventures.

It's also replete with goodbyes.

Saying Goodbye

Moving means saying farewell to grand things: jobs, co-workers, a house that was a home, friends and family.

There are also goodbyes to little things, those sparkles that brighten one's day. Like loving gestures whispered on the wind and permanently seared upon my heart. Now, without them, a pale cloud of thin sadness drifts over me.

It's the goodbye to a sumptuous farmers market filled with year-round delectable treats. Or the wistful farewell to a food co-op with a bulk section that inspired envy.

Goodbye To The Little Things

It's little conveniences that are figured out over the space of several years. To avoid frustrating freeway backups, I discovered bucolic back roads. I whisked through wide fields dotted with cows and horses, heads bent to the tufts of grass before them.

The car dealership that provided good service (how rare is that?) and courtesy car washes. Or, the best place to buy gas.

The hair stylist. I finally found a good hairdresser after enduring a series of terrible hair cuts. She listened to what I wanted. She knew her trade. My heart sinks to think of the hairdresser-search beginning again.

Goodbye To The Earth

I said goodbye to each plant and tree that I had planted in the front and back yards. I watched them grow and change through five years of seasons.

The maple tree in my front yard grew stronger and straighter than all my neighbors' trees planted at the same time. Maybe the water helped, maybe it was the love. 

That tree had a story. Soon after I moved in, one of the stakes holding the tree broke. The furniture maker who came to adjust a piece of furniture noted its state of disrepair. Without being asked, our goodbyes had already been said and we hadn't mentioned it, he drove back to my place with another one to replace it.

I happened to look out the window to see him at work. Each strike of his mallet on the stake was made with deliberate, careful attention. I didn't walk outside, not wanting to disturb this selfless act of caring. He never knocked on my door, never asked for recompense.

My heart still smiles when I think of it. His stake held tight over time against the fierce, delta winds. My maple tree reached to the sky with that firm support, straight and tall. 

I was able to thank him in person for his thoughtfulness, five years later when I had another piece of furniture to repair. He was sweetly proud of his handiwork and we stood together, admiring "our" straight tree.

I hope the new homeowners appreciate its regal beauty.

Little things, left behind as my car drove out of town.

Goodbye Held In The Heart

Use of The Radiance Technique® (TRT®) – TRT® hands-on supports us, especially when wistful feelings of loss pass over. It's not about making it go away, figuring it out, or shoving it down and putting a ribbon on top. 

It's the simplicity of a hand in your heart as you hold the loss, as you hold the love. The fire accessed with TRT® burns – quiet and steady. We are that fire deep within, burning bright, in gain and in loss.

Goodbye. Hello. The continuum of our lives.


A Song For Ariel

Saying Goodbye To The Neighbor's Kitty

Moving can include saying goodbye to the neighbor's kitty. 

Ariel, a long-haired grey cat, came into my life a couple of years after I moved in to my place in California. The neighbors in the two-story house behind me moved out and soon after, she started to appear in my backyard.

"Hello! I'm heading over the fence to hang out in your backyard." 

Whose Kitty Is This?

I visited the people in the house behind me, to check if the cat was theirs. I was deeply concerned this might a situation of people moving and abandoning their pets. But, fortunately, they confirmed the cat belonged to them and that her name was Ariel.

I have to say I don't "approve" of outdoor cats. Veterinarians agree that cats are healthier, safer and live longer lives when kept as indoor cats. 

A Backyard And A Kitty

But, when Ariel decided to make my backyard, her backyard, it didn't seem appropriate to lecture the neighbors on my views of proper care for cats.

Trying to chase her away would have been silly, as we're all familiar with the challenges of herding cats. 

I certainly couldn't wish her harm. In fact, on the contrary, I fell in love with her as my friendly neighbor and frequent visitor.

"Meow! I'm at your sliding glass door. Are you there?"

Enjoying The Backyard

Ariel and I both enjoyed the backyard. She would pop over the fence early in the morning and spend most of the day there. She had a couple of spots that had been worn smooth into comfy lairs by her body. 

She would greet me with a soft meow and come out from under the bushes when I entered the backyard. She'd come to the sliding glass door to say hello in the evening.

Being a cat lover, I wouldn't dream of resisting her sweet face and freely shared TRT® hands-on with her. I talked with her.

What a sweet, loving kitty. I could pick her up and hold her; she loved being petted. She was always kind and gentle with me when I handled her.

 I consciously made a decision to never feed her any food so she wouldn't think of my place as her real home, but she, nonetheless, made it her second home.

She would head over the fence, sometimes late at night, back to her own house. I'd tell her that she should be home with her family.

"My name is Ariel, and there are secrets within my eyes."

Saying Goodbye

I told Ariel, more than once, that I had to go away for good, that I was moving. Trying to explain that is not so easy even with other humans, much less animals.

I left a note for the new homeowners about her and I hope they will be kind to her. 

When we have to say goodbye, students of The Radiance Technique® (TRT®) are able to apply TRT® hands-on as they are preparing for the transition. Loss and grief are a natural part of leaving, even when you know you must go, even when you might look forward to departing for new adventures.

Students of The Second Degree of TRT® can also direct energy across time and space to people as well as to animals. 

I continue to direct radiant energy to Ariel and pray that she will be safe and sound.